How to Transform Parental Challenges into an Enjoyment -
Do you have a kid? If your answer is yes, then you have definitely thought on the upbringing of your child and the difficulties and challenges you have faced and/or will in future. So what was/is your experience? Was it more a challenge or an enjoyment?
You are not alone in this. All the parents have faced challenges and it is important to find the right solutions in a reasonable time frame. All of them try to be the best. But being the best is relative. There is not a single “the best” way to raise children. In the pile of responsibilities, needs, wants, priorities we forget very simple and important things. Our priorities and values, cultures, surroundings, etc. place us somewhere in the category “ladder” of parental success.
However, there are some universal steps that can help you raise respectful and worthy members of the society enjoying the ongoing parental life.
Putting the seeds of self-esteem in your kids and making sure their grow
Supporting and showing that you are standing next to your kid in all his/her beginnings is very important but giving them autonomy to accomplish everything themselves, is not less important. Letting kids do things independently will make them feel capable and strong. When you have to confront your child, avoid blaming, criticizing, or fault-finding, which undermine self-esteem. Avoid using offensive vocabulary in case of failure but try instead to make them learn from their failure. Help them transform their failure into success.
Praise their accomplishments, whether it is small or big. It will make them feel proud. Compliment more than criticize or give a constructive feedback. Make sure they know that their mistakes will never stop you loving them. Choose your words as well as your tone of voice and body language carefully. Often hug and kiss your kids.
Discipline is necessary in every aspect of life and a family is not an exception. Establishing house rules helps kids understand your expectations, their responsibilities and develop self-control. For example, your kid knows that he/she cannot use the phone unless he/she is done with the homework. Parents often make a mistake not following the discipline themselves. You cannot discipline kids by following the discipline one day and ignoring it the next. Being consistent is really essential. Your children should understand that you are not just imposing rules on them but instead they should realize the benefits and positive consequences of each rule established by the parent.
Nowadays everyone is sitting on the phones and in many families the mutual understanding between parents and children is decreasing day by day. It is important not to lose the ties with your kids as it is harder to restore them. As a parent you need to manage your time, be able to balance your work and private life. This brings us back to the discipline as well as being able to organize your day in a way that you can spend more time socializing with each other; going for a walk, cooking, watching TV, playing, just talking about anything, etc. Children at all ages are craving the attention and time of parents so it is important to give them that time.
In the majority of families, children spend more time with mothers and it is important for fathers to have touch points with their kids and to spend time with them whenever possible. It is due to remember that lack of attention brings misbehavior, aggression, disobedience, misunderstanding, etc.
One of the strongest abilities a parent should possess is the ability to listen and try to understand. We all know that generation gap plays an important role in the majority of misunderstandings. This age difference distances you from your child if you do not take contra measures. Try to create a friendly and trustworthy environment for your child and try to adapt your parenting style if needed. Time is changing so quickly so it is important to walk “next“ to your child not “behind” him/her.
Remember that being a parent is more an enjoyment than a challenge. It depends on how you perceive it and what actions you take towards it.
Please send your thoughts and suggestions at firstname.lastname@example.org